The Bells Have Made Me Deaf

I had to nip to the garage for diesel earlier. I’d also ran out of dog food so rather than go to the shop that sells the dried food, I opted for a couple of cans of Winalot marked down to 35p for no apparent reason. It smelled alright when I opened the tin. Nothing foul in there, almost good enough for sandwiches! Para wolfed it down and licked his plate clean. Now a few hours on he’s leaking gas that’s reminiscent of the dead animal processing plant outside Lisburn on a bad day.

Two weeks ago I sent my complete licence off for renewal all safely packed in the plastic wallet. This morning I received the new licence… just the bare bones in an envelope. The DVLNI have stolen my plastic wallet. Who could have guessed that level of corruption goes on in government offices. Some AA with a stationery fetish will be caught with a bottom desk drawer full of peoples plastic covers. The shame of it all.

Aduki Bean Stew

Serves 3

125g (4oz) aduki beans, soaked and cooked (save the cooking liquid)
The aduki beans take between 40 minutes and just over an hour to cook.
soya margarine to saute
1 onion, chopped
2 garlic cloves, finely chopped or crushed
1 medium leek, washed, halved lengthways and sliced thickly
1 large carrot, cut into long julienne strips
250g (8oz) mushrooms, cut into chunks unless very small
1 Tbsp sweet paprika
2 Tbsp wholemeal (wholewheat) flour
chilli sauce (eg Encona or Tabasco) to taste
1 tsp dark vegetable stock powder
1 Tbsp good soy sauce (eg Kikkoman)
1 Tbsp tomato puree (paste)
1 x 400g (14oz) can chopped tomatoes
To finish: freshly-ground black pepper and chopped fresh parsley to taste

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…. The OOO live from Leeds

I’ve just had the pleasure of listening to the best rendition of Pinball Wizard I’ve ever heard. The OOO were there somewhere in the background too but who needs them when you have a pal who can sing their lungs out.

I seem to have misplaced your address in one of the several house moves that occurred since my last effort to communicate. A great rock fell on me in 2001 and I’ve only just managed to struggle out from beneath it or I would have written before now. Really!

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…is the longest 30 minutes today.

Oh wait… we did ‘longest’ yesterday. Today was short. I spent most of it behind a wheel wondering how fast I could go before something rattled off the van. I began to fear for my life at 75 when it seemed to be still reaching for the road despite the speed wobble. I didn’t expect to get to Lurgan so fast. There was even time to drink a very hospitable cappuccino and listen to my stomach grumble at the lack of something lumpy to work on.

En route on the M1… there’s an old stone barn on the right hand side just before the Moira turn off. It’s been derelict for as long as I can remember and was one of the landmarks I looked out for as a child travelling to Portadown to visit grandparents. The front of it now displays a large sold sign. It will be nice to see the place refurbished to become somebodys home, but I don’t envy the view over the M1. With all those fumes, noise and vibration of heavy passing traffic, I hope they got it cheap.

Dull, wet, windy and the weather isn’t great either. Working the hell for leather shift with as many coffee breaks as I can manage. It’s going to be long in more ways than one. The dog is fed up too.

My machinery hates leatheron. It refuses to top stitch the stuff unless I hide it under a slice of kitchen roll. Parafin supposedly does the same job without the need to pick the bits out of the stitching but it stinks. Teflon spray is another aid when you don’t have a walking foot but that involves going shopping to get some as does the parafin. I kinda like the kitchen roll solution since I invented it. Toilet roll would do equally well for those longer stretches. Yes yes… sheer genius and you don’t even have to leave the house.

There’s more to kitchen roll than just a bra filler.